Wednesday, September 27, 2006
the one about mourning
the one about mourningCan you believe not one of us remembered the date you left us? Who can blame us? You didn't even want us there when you left to be with God.
We're told to mourn, but not to mourn like those who does not have hope, because our hope is in Jesus Christ.
I miss you so much. Sometimes, the memories of your wake still plague me. Whichever rituals were performed, I know you're in Heaven with Christ. But I can't forget how they fought for your inheritance. I can't forget the sight of them fighting over how we should hold your funeral wake. I can't forget him slapping me just because I refused to hold a joss stick. I can't forget, because I still remember. Most of all, I can't forget what I felt when I held my wailing mother in my arms. Or the sight of your earthly abode lying there.
I miss you so much. But I know it'll be selfish of me to call you back from somewhere which is definitely better than earth.
In loving memory, 23 Sep 2000. My dearest grandfather.
12:46 AM
Monday, September 25, 2006
the one about being a SP student
the one about being a SP studentLife has been getting back to normal. For one, I'm typing this on Jerri while watching ANTM. Went back to school today to discuss the Marina Bay project. I felt old. I mean... It's the first day of school and I'm third year student; I have no more classes in school anymore. MAN! I FEEL OLD!!!
Imagine walking down the corridors and literally have a story to tell about every place you walk to. Imagine walking down the corridors and seeing familiar faces everywhere. The lecturers know you; you know the lecturers; you know the places; the places know you. The lecturers stop you and ask you to advise the second years and/or first years. They talk about the time when you were first year and exclaimed out loud how time flies. And I have not graduated yet. We're just in the semi-graduation stage. Okay, fine, almost there.
I'll be going for ITP next week. It's my last phrase of poly life before I truly say "farewell". I'm ready to take on the last lap. It's my time to soar high. I'll be gone soon.
I know I'm going to miss it so much. I'll miss being a student of Singapore Polytechnic School of Info-Communications Technology. Despite all the screw-ups they have.
10:08 PM
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
the one where I've been missing
the one where I've been missingI know I've been gone for a long time. Been working at least 12-14 hours a day with Showtec Group for IMF Annual Meetings for the past 2 weeks. I'm exhausted. My energy is spent. I'll be back to share about what crap I've gone through as well as continue with the last 3 of the Seal judgments. When I become alive again, I promise I'll be back.
Today was the last day of IMF. I don't feel that melancholic feeling Jerelyn gets. I'm kind of glad it's over. No doubt I've learnt a lot about live events through this event, no doubt I got to know several wonderful people, no doubt I've earned quite a lot from this job, but truth be told, I'm glad to have my life back.
So now, it's back to rest and relax before I go for ITP. It's time to do some shopping, to regain my sleep and to spend quality time with my loved ones.
It's back to civilization.
11:56 PM
Sunday, September 10, 2006
the one on the 4 horsemen
I'm going to share on some serious stuff so read on if you feel intellectually and spiritually prepared. If you're a believer, take out your bibles; if you're a pre-believer, I pray that this will draw you to God rather than scare you off. Remember as you read this, God is a loving God. No doubt He may pour His wrath down, but His wrath is never directed at those who loves Him and whom He loves.
I've shared before that the Rapture and end times are topics I like to research on. And since Pastor is now starting on the seven seals, I decided to do my own study again. It never fails to amaze me what God can show me from the same passage again and again.
Let me share about what God has shown me so far. If you believe, as I do, that the rapture is Jesus Christ coming to take His people from earth, which will result in the disappearances of millions and millions of believer all over the world, leaving behind their material things and being caught up into mid air with Christ, then how do you start counting the seven years of tribulation which will then lead to the Glorious Appearing of Christ? Does it start from the Rapture?
Daniel 9:24-27 24Seventy weeks [of years, or 490 years] are decreed upon your people and upon your holy city [Jerusalem], to finish and put an end to transgression, to seal up and make full the measure of sin, to purge away and make expiation and reconciliation for sin, to bring in everlasting righteousness (permanent moral and spiritual rectitude in every area and relation) to seal up vision and prophecy and prophet, and to anoint a Holy of Holies.
25Know therefore and understand that from the going forth of the commandment to restore and to build Jerusalem until [the coming of] the Anointed One, a Prince, shall be seven weeks [of years] and sixty-two weeks [of years]; it shall be built again with [city] square and moat, but in troubles times.
26And after the sixty-two weeks [of years] shall the Anointed One be cut off or killed and shall have nothing [and no one] belonging to [and defending] Him. And the people of the [other] prince who will come will destroy the city and the sanctuary. Its end shall come with a flood; and even to the end there shall be war, and desolations are decreed.(A)
27And he shall enter into a strong and firm covenant with the many for one week [seven years]. And in the midst of the week he shall cause the sacrifice and offering to cease [for the remaining three and one-half years]; and upon the wing or pinnacle of abominations [shall come] one who makes desolate, until the full determined end is poured out on the desolater.
If you note verse 27, it is talking about the tribulation period. It also states that the event that will usher in that 7 years will be the convenant between 'he' [antichrist]and Israel. Which means that the Rapture will not begin the tribulation; God's own chosen people turning their backs on Him and signing that agreement with the antichrist will start the 7 years.
Sometimes I have no idea whether we should be envious of the Jewish race. Look into the history of time and you'll see that they are the most hated race ever. People persecute them endlessly, even up till today. Israel is surrounded by her enemies, they have no peace, they're always at war with someone. But shouldn't we envy them, because from the beginning of time till now, they are known as God's Chosen People?
I have not gotten very far into the Bible yet. I've only gotten as far into the first 21 months of the 7 years. In these first 21 months, the world will see the seven seals which only Christ can open. I confess that I'm no Bible expert but bear with me. This is a subject from my heart. I don't know about you but when I read about the end times, I'm filled with a spirit of urgency, a spirit that tells me that we can't live an eternity without Christ. God has been trying to get our attention. If the works He's doing now can't get your attention, maybe the Rapture will. If the Rapture still will not lead you to believe that Jesus is the only Way, then perhaps these judgments will.
Pastor mentioned before that the tribulation is also known as the "Age of Lawlessness". When mankind has pushed God to a corner, God finally gives man over to his own wickedness. However, before He allows man to do whatever man pleases, He has to take His people away first, which is why the Rapture has to happen before the tribulation.
These judgments are God's judgment on a world of wicked and evil men. Let's start with the 4 Horsemen of Apocalypse, which are also the first 4 of the seals judgments.
Revelation 6:1-8 1THEN I saw as the Lamb broke open one of the seven seals, and as if in a voice of thunder I heard one of the four living creatures call out, Come!
2And I looked, and saw there a white horse whose rider carried a bow. And a crown was given him, and he rode forth conquering and to conquer.(A)
3And when He broke the second seal, I heard the second living creature call out, Come!
4And another horse came out, flaming red. And its rider was empowered to take the peace from the earth, so that men slaughtered one another; and he was given a huge sword.
5When He broke open the third seal, I heard the third living creature call out, Come and look ! And I saw, and behold, a black horse, and in his hand the rider had a pair of scales (a balance).
6And I heard what seemed to be a voice from the midst of the four living creatures, saying, A quart of wheat for a denarius [a whole day's wages], and three quarts of barley for a denarius; but do not harm the oil and the wine! [II Kings 6:25.]
7When the Lamb broke open the fourth seal, I heard the fourth living creature call out, Come!
8So I looked, and behold, an ashy pale horse [[a]black and blue as if made so by bruising], and its rider's name was Death, and Hades (the realm of the dead) followed him closely. And they were given authority and power over a fourth part of the earth to kill with the sword and with famine and with plague (pestilence, disease) and with wild beasts of the earth.(B)
The 4 horsemen are symbolic. You won't exactly see 4 horsemen galloping down the streets so don't take them literally.
1) The White Horsemen
The Bible says that the White Horsemen is a conqueror. He will be given a bow and He will be victorious. But how will be go about conquering? He has a bow, but no arrow. Other passages indicate that he is a 'willful' king and that he will triumph through diplomacy. He will usher in false peace, promising world unity. Beware, the first horsemen will be known as the antichrist, the father of all lies.
2) The Red Horsemen
The Red Horsemen symbolizes war. Very simply, nations will rise against nations, men against men. This will be the greatest global war to have ever hit the earth.
3) The Black Horsemen
With war will come famine.
4) The Pale Horsemen
And finally, the Pale horsemen symbolizes death. The Bible says that Hades follow close behind him. The global war, and the famine that follows it will eventually result in the death of 25% of the world's remaining population after the Rapture.
I want you to know that our God is still a God of love. Despite all that is going to happen, it is His way of gaining your attention. Imagine, after all that would have happened in the history of mankind and you still deny Him, He has to do all He can to get you back to Him. Don't spend an eternity without Christ. He loves you, and He wants you back.
The question is, where are we right now? Pastor believes that we're at the end of the Church Age, which means that we're closer than never before to the Rapture.
Jesus Christ is coming back to get His church. And then, everything that the Bible has predicted will come to past. Question is, do you believe that Jesus is the only way of escape?
If you want to know more, feel free to contact me. My knowledge may be limited but I'm more than willing to share with you.
God bless you and keep you.
11:05 PM
Monday, September 04, 2006
the one about a song
终于作了这个决定 别人怎么说我不理
只要你也一样的肯定
我愿意天涯海角都随你去
我知道一切不容易
我的心一直温习说服自己
最怕你忽然说要放弃
爱真的需要勇气 来面对流言蜚语
只要你一个眼神肯定 我的爱就有意义
我们都需要勇气 去相信会在一起
人潮拥挤我能感觉你
放在我手心里 你的真心
如果我的坚强任性
会不小心伤害了你
你能不能温柔提醒
我虽然心太急 更害怕错过你
4:55 PM
Sunday, September 03, 2006
the one that's going to be long
This is going to be long coz it encompass my thoughts for the past 2 weeks.
If there's anything I'm surer of, office work is not for me. It makes me dumber. For one, I can't think intelligently in office. It's like a routine, a dead habit, a vicious cycle that goes on and on and on. You do your job, I do my job and we're part of the happy company family. The only times I felt like a thinking person were the times when I'm NOT in office. It's like the air just sucked out my ability to process thoughts.
The people are great. Well, lest for the only 2 local guys in office who supposedly are in charge of IT, they are the least friendly of all. Like temp staff cannot be trusted with things. Like big HAHA! On my last day of work, some of my colleagues even gave me farewell gifts. Ha! So touched!! It was kind of nostalgic when I had to finally do my last courier, send my last email, forwarded my last call and said my last goodbye. But Pauline said that they welcome me back anytime. *Grin*
Anyway, what have I been thinking about? You know we're like in the 3rd quarter of the year but we're still scraping the icing of Revelation book? And how I've always been into the Rapture and the tribulation part? I mean, different Christians like to use different topics to evangelize, like some likes to focus on the grace and forgiveness part and some like to preach of a loving God. Me? I rather push the urgency of the end of the world.
Yes, you did not read wrongly. The world is coming to an end. Look at the signs around you. Diseases are spreading around. New diseases are sprouting out every now and then. After the AIDS epidemic died down, SARS came along. Then bird flu, Dengue Fever and now bird flu again. Look at Middle East. There's no peace. Never will have until Jesus Christ comes to establish His kingdom on earth. Look at the so-called world unions around the world. Aren't they moving towards the so-called one world government? And the Bible predicted about all these 5000 years ago.
I started reading "Left Behind" series again. It grips me. It sets me thinking but since office has made me dumber, I can only think during lunch. It's the very thought of being well, left behind.
When the rapture comes, and when God takes His people with Him, there will be ultimate chaos. People will disappear in the twinkling of an eye, leaving ALL their earthly possessions behind. The remaining people would try to find answers to the disappearances or when they come to realize it's the work of God, they would question whether this is the work of a loving God. Biggest question is, when God has to do something so drastic as that, would it catch your attention?
That perhaps would be the biggest move of God to catch your attention. And if you miss His gift of salvation once, would you miss it again?
You see, I was thinking; it would be worse for people who know the truth but miss it, compared to the ignorant people who miss it. Sad isn't it? To be a "Christian" but misses His plan of salvation for you?
I pray with all my heart that I'm deemed worthy of the rapture. I don't call myself the perfect Christian. Despite what people may say, I know that I'm not a "walking Bible", nor am I a "spiritual giant". I may have been raised in a Christian environment but there were times when I stumbled and fell in my personal walk with Christ. I don't proclaim to have read the Bible every single day of my life, prayed long and meaningful prayers all the time, or wanted to evangelize and tell people of Christ every time I'm in a conversation. Quite the contrary, my prayers are so short and simple it would time less than 5 minutes from beginning to end, I read the Bible only when my spirit reminds me to and I can't bring myself to open my mouth to share Christ sometimes. But I so wish that my life, my testimony had helped to touch people along the way. I pray that my walk with Christ had been a fruitful one.
It's not because I’m afraid of trials and tribulation. Maybe I am but I want to be considered as one who belongs to God. That when I finally stand before Him and all my works were brought out and burnt with holy fire, I do not want them to disintegrate into ashes and smoke only.
I want my life to count for something. If I were to die and meet God, I want to hear Him say "Well done, my good and faithful servant". I want my life to produce fruits. I don't it to just pass and achieve nothing.
Which is why I've determined in my heart to be a social worker, helping ex-convicts return to society. I can't let my life waste away. If I have to live, then I want a live a life that touch other lives, one that impacts others.
People ask how come I'm so sure this is the life for me. If you ever receive a prompting in your heart that's so specific and so clear, if you can stay true to your ideals and aspirations despite how people put you down, if you see yourself doing it despite not knowing how to go about achieving this goal, if you have prayed and seek God and He has shown you His ways by closing others doors, then maybe you should pursue the prompting you have received.
Life is all about going up and going down. I may seem like the picture perfect person but I have my fair share of failure. Take my driving for example; it was quite a blow for me. Up till now, whenever I lie in bed before dozing off, my mind will repeatedly run the steps needed to do the various courses. I'll think and think and think about how and why I failed. It's not that I can't take failure. It's just that I've placed my self-confidence as a stake in my driving. I've put in so much effort that I can't take failure lying down. To be honest, I have no confidence whether I can pass this time round. I don't want to give myself expectations nor do I want to keep others' expectations up. Which is why, I refuse to tell people the date of my re-test. I rather fight this battle along with God by my side only.
1 Sep 2006 marked the start of the registration for PSC. I have no idea what tomorrow holds for me, but I know Who holds tomorrow. There's an inner peace in me that surpasses all understanding. It's going to be busy but fulfilling holidays. I look forward to so many things but I wish time could stop for me to enjoy my last teen year. Now that I'm on the verge of graduating from poly, I'm filled with a sense of anticipation. My life has a purpose and a direction. And I'm all out to fulfill them.
I like new beginnings.
I like living with a purpose.
I like living knowing God is beside me.
If God is going to call me home one day, I want to be ready.
6:05 PM