Monday, October 30, 2006
the one about my little secret
No one knew about my driving test. The only ones who knew the exact day, date and time were my parents, myself and God.
My last few revision lessons were totally hopeless. I mounted kerbs, I did wide left turns and narrow right turns, I cried behind the wheel. I felt useless. I felt like a failure.
Why did I choose not to tell anyone at all?
Why did I choose not to ask for prayer support or emotional support from those who claim who love me?
Why did I choose to fight this battle alone with God?
Perhaps this question is not meant for me to answer.
So who is the happiest when I pass?
My parents? Me? Those who believed in me? Those who were proven wrong? Or the people who would love to stand to gain from my license?
I believe God is the happiest of all. I imagine Him looking down, swelling with pride as I received my photocard license. He was my only Support, my only Cheerleader and the only Presence I want to bring with me. He was there when I gave up on myself, He was there in my disappointment, in my failure and in my success. No one knew how hard it was for me but Him.
I fought. I came forth victorious. But it was not my victory alone.
God fought alongside me all the time.
Gold 90.5 FM is playing lovely jazz and blues. Hmmm... makes me feel like dancing.
11:31 PM
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
the one when "to live is Christ, and to die is gain"
Do we ever fully understand what Paul was saying when he said in Philippians 1:21 that "for him to live is Christ, and to die is gain"? Or what it means to be "crucified with Christ"?
Merely means, my life is not my own; it belongs to You Lord.
"The Lord gives and takes away, but blessed be the name of the Lord"Hallelujuah
I am not my own
You are in control
Hallelujah
For me to live is Christ
And to die is gain
No matter what price I pay
I choose to give this life away
-"To live is Christ" by Parachute BandParachute Band is having a concert at 81 Woodlands Circle on 5 Nov(Sunday) at 2.30pm. You're invited. =)
6:58 PM
Friday, October 20, 2006
the one about victory
I fought and I came forth victorious.
But the victory is not mine, but belongs to the Lord.
Not mine, but Your glory, Lord.
I come before You today
And there's just one thing that I want to say
"Thank You Lord"
"Thank You Lord"
3:18 PM
Thursday, October 19, 2006
the one about a lonesome battle
Imagine going out for battle. You look behind you, wanting to rally your troops but realise that there is no one behind you.
There's only you. You alone.
You look ahead to where your enemy is. Bigger, stronger, mightier. You're no match for him. You have an urge to turn and run away, or bury yourself in the sand and hide, but the only path you can take is to advance forward.
Do you know how it feels to fight a battle alone? I do. I fight the same battle every night, depriving myself of sleep, rest, and most importantly, depriving myself of the peace I was promised of.
I look around me and there's no one there. Where are the people who claimed they love me when I needed them? Where are my generals, my soldiers, my trumpeter? Where is everyone?
I do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the principalities of the world. I can't see my enemy. And yet, I fight my battle against fear and anxiety alone. Or am I?
No, I am not. When I'm in despair, I fall to my knees each time to meet the greatest Commander-in-chief I can ever know.
I am not alone because He is with me.
I am not alone because He will never leave me, nor forsake me.
I am not alone because He loves me.
And with Him on my side, who can be against me?
Will I be victorious? Yes, because He said so.
Is it my victory? No, because all glory belongs to Him.
So in the end, I guess it's just You with me, Lord. In Christ alone
I place my trust
And find my glory in the power of the cross
In every victory
Let it be said of me
My source of strength, my source of hope
is Christ alone
12:14 AM
Friday, October 13, 2006
the one about 2530 的未来
I changed template! Not because I have too much time on my hands, but because my previous layout will not work on Safari or Firefox, it's a stubborn IE loyalist.
So I'm here at home in the afternoon, resting before I go to work for the night. I was listening to the 5th episode of 2530 的未来 and now, 我感触蛮多。
在我们的社会里，家庭价值观并不是那么根深蒂固。政府不断的鼓励人民结婚，生子。那未来呢？
2530 的未来故事环绕着的，就是我们的未来。想象一下， 公元2030年的新加坡不必为人口老化的问题而担心，不必为了人民生育着着想，因为那时新加坡人肯主动结婚，生子。 可是，结婚的人多，离婚的人也变多。为了减少离婚现象，政府出了一个政策，如果你要结婚，那你就要先通过考试，考到结婚执照后才能结婚。
很怪吧，别担心，这只是故事情节。故事里的主人翁阿Ken 正要和多年相爱的叶敏结婚,但是偏偏就是考不到执照.考了那么多次却一直fail。不只浪费钱,也浪费时间.更何况敏敏也等阿Ken三年了。故事今天播到第5集，我们也终于知道为何阿Ken一直考不到结婚执照。原来，他想结婚的理由不只是爱敏敏而已，而是为了升值加薪。因为阿Ken的公司蛮注重家庭观念，所以只要是有家庭的人都会受到重赏。
所谓的考试是由电脑执行的。它不会出错因为它是"最好的".而电脑只要能感应出你是深爱对方的，就会让你pass. 它如果感应出你结婚的目的是不安好心的，比如买房子等，它就会fail你。今天这一集就播到阿Ken重考的那一天，含着目的的爱，到底能不能经过考验？
你能接受有目的的爱吗？
如果在今世今日的社会需要考到执照才能结婚，你会pass吗？
你结婚只是因为爱对方吗？还是为了别的原因？
含着目的的爱到底能维持多久？
很有趣吧。
7:39 PM
Thursday, October 12, 2006
the one about randomness
the one about randomness I love daisies.
I agree with Meg Ryan from "You've got mail". No idea whether she meant it, but I truly think that daisies are the happiest flowers. You look at them, and they seem to be smiling back at you. They don't look retarded like sunflower, nor close themselves up like roses, but they just open up when the time is ripe and smile brightly at the world.
I love daisies. I'm so glad they're the flowers representing my birth month. *beam* And ya Jeremy, Diamond is my birthstone and is sure a girl's best friend.
Radio 1003 广播剧 is back! 2530 的未来 is their 台庆剧. Go listen! Everyday either at 0735, 1215 or at 2200. I love their 广播剧. The story is close to the heart, the lines are funny and the accompanying music fits the storyline. Hehe... But this time the show only has 20 episodes. If only Singaporeans will place some emphasis on radio shows and perhaps we'll have more quality 广播剧.
I can only imagine.
6:25 PM
Saturday, October 07, 2006
the one after my first week of ITP
the one after my first week of ITPFirst week of ITP is finally over. We survived it. 16 more weeks to go before we truly say farewell.
I more than survived my first week of ITP, I survived my very first overnight shift. Truth be told, prior to this semester, I have never been exposed to the real storms faced in this industry. After IMF and now in MCS, I understand how demanding this industry is. Yet, I enjoy every moment, just do not enjoy the fact that I'm unable to enjoy local TV anymore.
I'm grateful to have the opportunity to work at IMF and now at MCS. I may not be a know-it-all in this area, I may not get the chance to serve God with whatever little He has given me in this area, I may not get the recognition others get but heck! Who else can get this chance to learn from the only local broadcast station in S'pore?
ITP's alright. I just can't stand the feeling of having nothing to do, so give me all the tapes to digitize!! My supervisor is a very nice person, and I'm so grateful to have come to this department where they are willing to teach me stuff. I'm going to learn new things!!
I'm totally exhausted. Tried sleeping my day away but I could not get proper rest. I guess I know why God set the night for sleep and rest. Still, I'm grateful.
Satisfied.
11:50 PM