Friday, May 18, 2007
the one about disappointment & expectations
I did not get to become main graduate speaker. Truth be told, I'm actually quite relieved. At least I do not need to represent my cohort, perhaps then, Graduation 2007 will be totally stress-free fot me.
Like what I told my trainer, Ms. Jeanine Lim, I was not so sure how much I wanted it. And because there weren't any expectations, there wasn't disappointment as well. Don't get me wrong, I did give my 100%. Just didn't really wanted to fight for it.
I'm glald Nasir is main speaker. Still, SMIT graduation speech 2007 belongs to me as well, coz I wrote the bulk of it. If you get a chance to be there, listen to the message of Refiner's fire. Although I know it's not adequate enough to compare, yet when I was writing the speech, the story of Refiner's fire came to me.
4 more days to graduation.
4 more days before there's no more reason for me to return.
4:22 PM
Saturday, May 12, 2007
the one about countdown to graduation
I'm amazed at how God works. I received an email from NUS yesterday. They're offered me the FASS Scholarship. Funny thing is that I asked for a direction, and God gave me my direction the day after I prayed for it. Now that this NUS Scholarship is here, all the more I'm sure of which door God has opened for me. The NUS scholarship only covers tuition fees, while NTU covers everything but accommdation.
It's amazing how God provides.
Graduation's in less than 2 weeks' time. I'm looking forward to it, yet dreading it. That day will mark the last day I actually have to return to SP. From that day onwards, I would have no more reason to return. No more classes, no more activities, no more events, no more training for grad speakers, no more interviews, no more. Yet, it's a day of triumph, a day of celebration and a day for rejoicing.
Still, I wish that I can be like any one of my friends, to graduate quietly, to be able sit with my peers and rejoice together. I hate all these limelight on me. I rather not want what gold medal, what awards, though I welcome the prize money. I'm not as good as they write or say I am. I have no idea how they managed to dig out so many facts about me and made such a hoo-ha about it. I just want to be ordinary at times.
Yet, I know that all I have is not mine, but they belong to God.
I'm so grateful for my 3 years here.
It's 10 days to graduation.
11:58 PM
Thursday, May 03, 2007
the one where you accompany me grow old
Thank you everyone who sent your love to me when the clock struck 12, the well-wishes that came early or late or on time, and thank you for the fact that you guys remembered my existence.
::: Thank you Pa, Ma and Kor for the early birthday dinner.
::: Thank you Musos for the present. Thank you Priscilla and Adriel for actually shopping for it. It's a timely gift. Thank you Candice and Pacer for your birthday prayers.
::: Thank you Shu Hui, Alan and Sherilyn for your Kbox treat. Also thank you Shu Hui and Alan for "Nineteen Minutes". Heh.
::: Thank you Jeremy for dinner treat at Fish & Co on my birthday itself.
::: Thank you Ma and Kor for sharing my birthday cake with me.
::: Thank you Gan Ma, Ben Tan, Clara, Johnny, Jerelyn and Jeremy from the Ohana for taking time off to eat, drink, laugh and catch up. Thank you Jerelyn for the effort to get me what I want. And no, it's not a year's supply of trash bag.
::: Thank you Erina and Tzi Yun for having dinner with me on Wednesday. Thank you for the MPH vouchers. Very useful gift.
::: Thank you Adriel, Tzi Yun, Kevin, Chang Yang, Clara, Susan, Xiao Wei, Nat, Wei Ping, Michelle Heng, my Dad from Indonesia, Kenneth from Taiwan, Gan Ma, Erina, Wei Jie, Cindy, Alan Yong who wished me at my birth time 2210 exactly, Sister Karen, Sherilyn and Naresh who was one day late. Thank you for your birthday sms-es. Not forgetting Jerelyn, Jeremy and Auntie Lydia who called and sang a birthday song to me when the clock struck 12am on 30 April 2007.
::: Most importantly, thank You Lord for your blessings for these 20 years and the next 20 years to come, and next next 20 years to come till I go home to You. Thank You for the birthday scholarship which has given me a direction in my otherwise confused state.
Still to come will be birthday celebration with Chang Yang and Pam. I'll also be meeting Susan and Cindy for dinner on Tuesday.
Thank you everyone for the well-wishes. I feel so loved.
I'm blessed to be a blessing!
9:52 PM